Child, Never Doupt Your Value

I just watched the series of "The Chronicles of Narnia" for the first time. I don't know why I never watched it before but those are the most amazing movies I've ever seen. But I guess God knows why he never put the desire in my heart to watch it. If I would have watched it 3 or 4 years before now, I don't think I would have understand that much! On my journey with God in the last 3 years, I was able to learn a lot about God the Bible and his truth but I know that we will always be in a process of learning.

In the last few days I couldn't get those movies out of my head. Espacially the relationship the little girl Lucy has with Aslan! In the movie, she is the youngest of the 4 siblings but somehow she always sees Aslan(he represents Jesus) and believes also that He is always with them. I am the youngest in my family and I have 3 siblings. My oldest brother goes his way with God but my other brother and my sister struggle a lot. Sometimes it is so hard to see that and still believe that God will touch their hearts.

I want to share with you a scene of the second movie which kind of touched two big areas of my life. It is Lucy talking to Aslan after she just spoke a spell over herself to be her older sister Susan. She wanted to be Susan because of her Beauty but the whole short scene makes her feel terrible. So the spell disappears and Aslan shows up...

(so first the youtube Video of what happens with a song and then the conversation between Lucy and Aslan)

Aslan: Lucy

Lucy: Aslan???

Aslan: What have you done Child?

Lucy: I don't know. That was aweful.

Aslan: But you chose it Lucy!

Lucy: I didn't mean to chose all of that. I just wanted to be beautiful like Susan! That's all!

Aslan: You wished yourself away! And with it much more! Your Brothers and Sister wouldn't know Narnia without you Lucy! You discovered it first, remember??

Lucy: I'm so sorry!

Aslan: You doupt your value! Don't run from who you are.

So that conversation just really touched my heart. How many times do we wish to look like somebody else. But I guess with that desire we wish much more than we actually want. We forget our value and who we are! I have done that so many times. Often I looked at people and I wanted to have something that they had. But now I really try to look in the Miror imagining Aslan(Jesus) standing next to me and warning me saying "love yourself, don't run away from who you are, cause that's what I made you to BE. You have a destiny and I need you for that exactly as who you are". 

And also how he tells her "you have seen Narnia first, without you, your brothers and your sister wouldn't know it". It just gave me so much strenght to be who I am and to follow God's calling. Cause like I said I have also 2 brothers and 1 sister and people have spoken over my life that the way I follow God will touch my family. I will believe in that and really continue to appreciate who I am and how I look cause I think everytime I look in the mirror and think something is wrong Jesus, is standing there with tears in his eyes and telling me "why do you always doupt your value??"!

In our Lords Kingdom we are all Kings and Queens so lets start to think, live and fight like Kings and Queens!

Thanks for reading it and I hope it will encourage you!!

(Theme song)

So the last few weeks I was thinking about my past. Times when I came to a new place and I wanted to impress people. Times I was in a place of speaking in front of a group. I was thinking about what is going through my mind in those moments. Here some thoughts I had in those situations: "How should I give myself to impress them? What would be really smart to say? I really hope they think I look good? Should I be more quiet so people like me? How could I change that they completley accept me?". But I think what I processed most in those last few weeks were times I fell in love. I realized that in the past I compromised some of my standards, just to impress a guy or I tried to change me, my character, the way God made me. I had thoughts like "Maybe he doesn't like my body! No he told me I am beautiful! But why doesn't he like me more than a friend. Oh I think I am to loud. I should be more quiet and interesting. I shouldn't be as extroverted. Maybe I am too holy. I guess I talk about God and his ways way to much. I really gotta figure out what I gotta change to make HIM like me! I guess he would not wait with sex until we get married and he knows that I want to wait. Would he like me if I would sleep with him?".
Those were some thoughts I had in those times. Does that sound familiar to you? Have you had those thoughts before? Isn't it crazy to even spend a second to think like that. Our almighty, loving, all knowing, perfect God calls us his MASTERPIECE and we think about what we could change about ourselves so a person that might not even matter that much in our live could like us a little more. I just think that's crazy. But still we fall into that thinking process over and over again. I guess that really shows that we need God even more. Or at least it helped me to realize that I need him so much more. Cause the world tells me constantly I gotta change. And then I meet a guy and he doesn't like me the way I am. Of course I have to change something. Cause we are in a world that tells you "if you want something, get it no matter what the cost". That's so sad.
I really want to learn to love myself more and more. To be so confident in who I am that I know if someone doesn't like me it is not my fault. It is not something I have to work on. It is because the way God made the other person. And also it is because God has something else for us. Maybe something way different or also maybe to a total different timing than we think is right!
I am really learning to trust the Lord that he made me as his masterpiece. That he was thinking about the perfect plan he has for me when he made me. And that he needs me to be who I am to fulfill this plan!!
So I want to encourage you also to appreciate the way God made you. Appreciate the time he invested of getting your lifeplan ready!! You are perfect and awesome! Believe it!!!

So yesterday I was out with a few friends. I had like an hour to drive home and I was suuuuper tired. The idea of keeping myself awake was praying. So I started praying for the fun time I had out with my friends, their lives, and about the whole process I am learning and wrote about. I listen to some music from an old TV show called "Dawson's Creek". And then the song below came on. It was like God singing a song to me and it made me just laugh!! Here it is: =)