You are not alone in this...

Oh my gosh....

I am so sorry for not posting anything for so long!
I have been super busy! Aaaaaaand I finally met my man. My Prince Charming. Maybe that is one of the reasons I haven't posted for this whole time. I guess I was busy getting to know him and being in love!

For all who want to know more about it this part is for you. For the other ones just scroll down a little bit. His name is Matthias Pletscher. He turned 25 in december, that means he is about 1 1/2 years younger than me, which is not a problem at all. We met in church camp last September. I knew his family already a while but not him. I met him,we fell in love and about a month later we started dating. I didn't expect to meet him in churchcamp. I was totally confused having those feelings for him.
There were times in the past that I doubted my man would ever show up. And I didn't believe when people told me "HE will come and God will surpass all your hopes and dreams you have ever had about Mister Right."
But they were so right. I would not want anybody else. Cause THE ONE I have is the biggest gift of God for me and I am deeply thankful for Matthias! We laugh, we cry, we pray and we love life together and we do struggle at times with staying pure. But we get up and figth again and pray that God would use us to bring heaven on earth and to let us be living testimonies for him.
Okay I don't want to talk too much about Matts(that's how he is called) and me. Just one more fact about us. So many people say it is weird to see us. It is almost as if we are the same Person just male and female, or comments like "there was never a couple I met that fits so well than you two", so that is really affirming us and our relationship!

That was it about the amazing update on my life. But for all of you singles out there. I want to tell you a little something. When I was single there was a point when I decided to be happy with life even if I don't have a boyfriend. And I am so glad that I did it. Cause it helped me to deeply fall in love with God. My creator, saviour, friend, counseler, healer!
It has helped me to see my worth in God. It has helped me to love myself when it seemed like no one could ever fall in love with me.
I guess I understand more and more what Paul from the Bible ment when he talked about "if you are single then stay single cause you can full on put your concentration on God"!! Hahah don't get me wrong I don't want to be single again. I am super happy to be a girlfriend and wife to be but these are just my thoughts I had the last few weeks....
I find it really hard to be a good girlfriend and a good daugther of God. But I know God is so patient with me. He teaches me what it means. I am not too far into this process yet cause it just started around 3 weeks ago, that I realized that I needed more time with God again. Cause everything gets really hard and taugh when I don't have those times.
And you know what?? It is true, when you have a boyfriend your insecurities won't just go away. Nope they are still here. I still struggle with feeling to big at times. I struggle even more with being pure. Cause before, you don't just want to give your love to somebody. But know I have someone I truly love and it seems way more tempting to go further than I actually want to in my heart.

So what I am learning right now is, what does it mean to love myself when I have someone next to me? What does it mean to be pure in a relationship? What does it mean to respect and honor my boyfriend? And how do I love my creator first and then the man I want to spend the rest of my life with?

I am not sure if this posts helps anybody. I guess it helps me to process my walk with God. And I defenteley hope there is someone out there who reads this post and feels exactly the same and just needed to know! YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS!

I hope you have a wonderful week! Thank you for taking the time and reading this post!